Sunday, 30 September 2007

Everyone hates us, we don't care

OK, I admit it. If you promise to put away the thumbscrews and remove those electrodes from my genitals I'll confess that, despite having something of a Welsh heritage, I could barely conceal my giggles as Fiji stormed into a convincing half time lead against Wales yesterday.

The fact that the match then turned into an absolute classic in the second half, with the Welsh storming back to rescue the game before succumbing to a truly heroic late charge by the Flying Fijians, should not detract from the point that, despite my parentage and my innate Britishness, by the end I was desperate for Fiji to win.

I know that sounds wrong and, believe me, there's a part of me that feels suitably guilty but, just as every Celt worth his or her salt would have been screaming for a Tongan victory on Friday evening (and will be willing the Aussies on to victory next weekend), I feel it only fair that we should return the favour and so I freely admit to supporting the efforts of Fiji, Italy and Argentina this weekend.

As the CEO of the Australian RFU, John O'Neill, put it at the back end of last week, in his entirely inappropriate (and failed) attempt to secure the Total Flanker Dunderhead of the Week award: " We all hate England."

If that's the case then we little Englanders really should adopt the attitude of Millwall FC supporters whose "Everyone hates us, we don't care" attitude is a rallying call and a source of considerable motivation. The point, however, is that we are sensitive souls deep down and really DO care and, in the absence of love and/or respect heading in our direction, the only sensible course of action is to reciprocate and wish all those who seek our demise the absolute worst of fortune at this World Cup.

For John O'Neill not to have secured the Dunderhead trophy this week is quite an achievement. Surely no other rugby personality could have been quite so crass in the last seven days? Step forward the IRB for their entirely inappropriate and over-the-top reaction in banning the Tongans from dyeing their hair green for Friday's game against England. Such a shame that the Tongans did not have access to (or resources for) legal advice on this issue as I'd be fascinated to know on what grounds the IRB could possibly justify this case of outrageous bullying. Shame on you.

Finally, it was educational to see the so-called fastest man in world rugby, Brian Habana, outstripped for pace by little-known USA winger Takudzwa Ngwenya this evening. As commentator Murray Mexted said, there's almost certainly a professional contract somewhere now awaiting the signature of this piece of greased lightening.


sportsfreak said...

Agree with your dunderhead selection of the week TF, although there's a bit of competition around at the moment; Brian O'Driscoll putting in a late challenge too I note with a bleat tinged ever so slightly with hypocricy.

But there's something particularly disturbing about your post....

Are you guys really having to put up with Mexted as a commentator?

Total Flanker said...

Yep, Mexted is often the commentating side-kick for the less high profile games over here. To be fair he hasn't been too bad!

sportsfreak said...

You wait until he gets an All Black game TF....

Here's this:

(BTW, its satire guys; although based on true events)

Fence said...

Well I will be the sole Celt supporting England in their next match. Yes, I cheered on their opposition so far, but against Australia? It's gotta be England.

Course I'll also be cheering on France against NZ, Fiji against South Africa, and Argentina against Scotland, and am guessing that only one of those matches will go the way I want :)